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Andrea, Jennifer, and The 2 Williams.

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Title : Andrea, Jennifer, and The 2 Williams.
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Andrea, Jennifer, and The 2 Williams.

I assured you that I would write this post. It's something that should be very fun for me, but I've made it obligatory. I said "It's one of my favorite stories ever." And then, fooling about in the comments:
Every task seems like more fun than the subject I regard as the ripest of the week, Andrea, Jennifer, and The 2 Williams. 
What is wrong with me? I just got up to make my 5th cup of coffee! 
Did William Shakespeare drink coffee? Did William Faulkner?... 
"He didn't have coffee, he didn't have vanilla, he didn't have cocoa. Imagine writing Hamlet without a cup of coffee. That's amazing."... 
Faulkner drank, but not so much coffee. 
"Jeezus Christ! Have you ever heard of anyone who drank while he worked? You’re thinking of Faulkner. He does sometimes—and I can tell right in the middle of a page when he’s had his first one"

So, yes, the "2 Williams" are Shakespeare and Faulkner. They were in the news last night because Andrea — Andrea Mitchell, the NBC News chief Washington correspondent — tweeted something so mind-bogglingly stupid — stupid, evil, and hilarious — and Jennifer — Jennifer Rubin, the WaPo columnist — lunged horribly after Andrea's tweet. These people — Mitchell and Rubin — are supposed to be the elite, but they are not even elite enough to keep from stumbling over a high-school level literary reference or even to think of making sure — with the quickest Google — they're not making a gaffe. 

Andrea saw what looked like it might be an opportunity to mock Ted Cruz.

He'd gone on Fox News and said: “The Democrats want a week of political theater raging at Donald Trump. Reminds me of Shakespeare. It’s full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

She tweeted:

@SenTedCruz says #ImpeachmentTrial is like Shakespeare full of sound and fury signifying nothing. No, that’s Faulkner

Now, that's a bit restrained in its arrogance, and, of course, stupid. The Faulkner title "The Sound and the Fury" is derived from one of the most famous soliloquies in Shakespeare, which includes the longer phrase deployed by Cruz — "full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." 

Jennifer immediately galumphs in. Only 6 minutes elapse before she's got this semi-coherent tweet published:

Now that's and it says volumes about his lack of soul. That's Any Thinking Person.

The coherent part is "it says volumes about his lack of soul." And your tweet, Jennifer? What does it say volumes about you? Who the hell do you think you are to make grandiose pronouncements about somebody else's soul? And what did you intend to say about Any Thinking Person? You, the specific person, did not think too hard before belching that out. 

Andrea Mitchell struggles to get herself off the hook with: "I clearly studied too much American literature and not enough Macbeth. My apologies to Sen. Cruz." That's not an apology, and it's not a good excuse. Mitchell has a degree in English literature (from the University of Pennsylvania). Stressing American literature can't explain away the mistake:  

1. First, that's high-school level literature. Mitchell is 4 years older than I am, and I can tell you my junior year high school English class memorized that particular Shakespeare speech. I can still recite it by heart. It's Macbeth! No concentration on other works of literature should have prevented her from encountering the "Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow" speech. 

2. Even if you only studied Faulkner and never studied Shakespeare, you would read "The Sound and the Fury." You can't read that without wondering what the title means. There is no way you would avoid receiving the lesson that the title is derived from the Macbeth speech. The assertion that you are so tremendously learned in American literature is utterly unbelievable. You just sound like an abject liar, Andrea. It is a tale told by an idiot.

3. If you really were a person who reads and understands literature, you would know that — in the world of novels — a character who corrects other people curtly in that pedantic "No, that’s Faulkner" manner is an icky prig. I've read a lot of novels, and characters who talk like that are up to no good. That snootiness, even when there's no mistake, marks a character for whom you know instinctively you are not supposed to feel sympathetic. And let me just add that when the novelist makes a character utter words like "it says volumes about his lack of soul," the competent reader knows immediately that it is the speaker of those words who lacks soul. 


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