Title : It was cowardly of the NYT not to include a comments section on this one.
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It was cowardly of the NYT not to include a comments section on this one.
"A Guide to Dating Women Raised in a Matriarchy?/Yes, I have a single mom. Don’t panic," by Zoe Greenberg — a member of the editorial staff of the Opinion section. I guess membership has its privileges.I grew up firmly in a matriarchy. My grandmother divorced my grandfather when she was 31 and had four young daughters. She wanted more kids, so she very briefly married a man she had met at the neighborhood plant store in order to get his sperm to have a fifth child. She raised her five girls mostly by herself. My mom chose to be a single mom and also had five children: My older siblings and I have donor dads, and my two younger siblings are adopted from Guatemala.Greenberg's message is that there are women without fathers, and when you encounter one, you need to take it in stride. Men who don't, who go poking after what remnant of a father this woman might have somewhere, are going to get summarily cut from the woman's life. Which seems to suggest that living without a man leads to more living without a man, but don't you dare pick up that clue or you won't even have a ghost of a chance.
When I tell my dates I grew up without a dad, I can see the synapses in their brains begin to spark. The first question that comes up for them is, I think, simply a curious one: What would a life without a father look like? And then panic sets in: Where did the father go? Were there no men? What happened to the men? Does she hate men? And then, the rational and generous part of the brain re-enters and produces a soothing idea: It must have been a weird and almost inexplicable life, which I can try to excavate through my clever questions....
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