Title : "When we cling to the idea of motherhood as sacrifice, what we really sacrifice is our sense of self, as if it is the price we pay for having children."
link : "When we cling to the idea of motherhood as sacrifice, what we really sacrifice is our sense of self, as if it is the price we pay for having children."
"When we cling to the idea of motherhood as sacrifice, what we really sacrifice is our sense of self, as if it is the price we pay for having children."
"Motherhood is not a sacrifice, but a privilege — one that many of us choose selfishly. At its most atavistic, procreating ensures that our genes survive into the next generation... On a personal level, when we bring into the world a being that is of us, someone we will protect and love.... By reframing motherhood as a privilege, we redirect agency back to the mother, empowering her, celebrating her autonomy instead of her sacrifice.... If we start referring to motherhood as the beautiful, messy privilege that it is, and to tending to our children as the most loving yet selfish thing we do, perhaps we can change the biased language my mother used. Only when we stop talking about motherhood as sacrifice can we start talking about mothers the way that we deserve."The NYT op-ed "Motherhood Isn’t Sacrifice, It’s Selfishness," by novelist Karen Rinaldi, is a riff fueled by something irksome her mother said. Rinaldi was planning a summer vacation at a beach house with her husband and 2 young sons and her mother came out with: “Oh, that’s not much of a vacation for you. I’ll bet you can’t wait to get back to work. Motherhood, it’s the hardest job in the world. All sacrifice!”
I'll bet a hundred different essays (or novels) could be written with that remark as a prompt. If it were a creative writing assignment imposed on me, I'd go in the direction of: What possesses a mother to ruin her daughter's vacation like that? Is she trying to get back at her for some long-ago ruined vacation of her own? Or: Jeez, has an original thought ever passed through my mother's head?
Maybe that is where Rinaldi began, seeing her mother as a conduit of tiresome propaganda and looking for an alternative. No, it's not sacrifice, it's privilege. Don't feel sorry for me, celebrate me! This is the new propaganda. Come on, everyone. Be a conduit for the propaganda I've devised to blot out the old propaganda.
Thus articles "When we cling to the idea of motherhood as sacrifice, what we really sacrifice is our sense of self, as if it is the price we pay for having children."
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